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Besides, the best revenge is living well and there’s nothing quite like seeing the underdog succeed despite all of his or her disadvantages. The cognitive dissonance Now, I’m going to be blunt: dating can suck when you’re fat.

Societal standards of beauty are not only arbitrary but often literally impossible to achieve without Photoshop and make-up and there are assholes out there who feel empowered to mock fat people with impunity.

"Date an Asian chick" has become akin to "Go skydiving" or "Live in New York" in the veritable white guy bucket list.

Of course, dating an Asian girl is very different from dating your typical Nancy or Betty.

So, as her white, Jewish (80% of the time), totally-secure-and-normal boyfriend, you better be prepared for when your girlfriend mistakes "soup or salad" for "super salad." And since Asians have eyes like gravy boats, her crying jags are bound to extend late into the night. STEP FOUR: Locking it Down If you've made it this far, then you know all the dirty secrets of dating an Asian girl. You know we pretend to love drinking, even though we turn into full-blown red-faced injuns when we do. (According to my mom, the tradition stems from the groom's family giving the bride's family a cow in exchange for her.) So, if you're going to marry an Asian, get ready to empty your pockets. Of course, because of this, my parents want me to marry a Chinese guy and my brother to marry a white girl.

THE FIRST TIME I got a whiff of judgement about my interracial marriage came from a close friend of my family. While some Japanese people looked upon his “fetish” with distaste. On my side, I got yelled at by older people while in a more traditional part of Japan for “denying my cultural identity” as a Japanese woman (I learned quickly how to say “I’m a Chinese person” — it didn’t always make a difference).

STEP ONE: Finding an Asian Asian girls typically hang out at one of three places: the mall, the library, or Pinkberry. If, by the end of the night, she giggles into her napkin/hand fan, you've got yourself a second date.

The whites, the Jews, the Chinese — nobody will ever accept them.” “WHAT. From our dear family friend and her “concern” over my husband’s and my nonexistent children, to the couple at Denny’s who loudly talked about how “upsetting” and “shameful” we were, ugly commentary about my interracial marriage usually fell into three major categories. But when people did cast judgement, there was no mistaking it, no lack of subtlety. On my husband’s side, as a Ph D student researching Japanese culture, some of his peers would lay eyes on me and, without even bothering to find out if I was Chinese, Japanese, Korean, etc., would roll their eyes and say, “Of COURSE you have a Japanese wife.” The idea that my husband MUST be so obsessed with all things Japanese that he had to “get him one of them Japanese girls” came up more often than I ever expected.

I will say that while living on the mainland US, people were rather predictable with their ignorant comments. As Japan is a very polite and considerate culture, my husband and I mostly went about our daily life with relatively few negative reactions — save for the occasional stares from older people or children on the subway.

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You probably know by now that having an Asian girlfriend is a rite of passage for all white men.

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